Who I Am

How can you live with me & not understand me?

Everyday you act so shocked by the way I act.

Does 16 years mean nothing to you?

Or is it simply because you refuse to try

Asking me to teach you who I am?

Teen or no teen you need to try, need to study.

We're not so different when you're in your right mind.

But that has become less & less often & it just makes this harder

Quietly I have taken every blow, but you aren't family

I wish you were, but time keeps going & you fall further away

Never do you try to reach out to me, never will you be able to.

Six & ten years. Long enough to get to know me

Long enough to see who I really am

See the pain I hide behind my pretty face

Time enough to win my heart

Hearts have to be won & you wasted time on others.

While a small beating heart throbbed in the next room.

A small heart that has grown solid when the girl sees you.

Girls should love their parents, I only feel pity

Pity that tugs at my heart to see your pain

Come too late, come at a time that passed long ago

You're late, far too late to win my admiration

Because at the end of the day, you don't know me.

You've not heard my sobs, silent as they are

Never have you seen my fears, nor my agonizing pain

Worst of all, you've never seen me blissful

These are all things you'll never see

Actions by you may inflict pain or sorrow

But you'll never see it.

My face will go blank, my body unresponsive.

Simply because after 16 years of life together

After 16 years under the same roof

You still have no idea who I am.