SO. There's this guy. I kinda really have an on the verge of being REALLY BIG crush on him ... he's so different. Which means that he's like every other guy I've liked ... I tend to like weird guys. He's got me smiling like crazy. Idk ... he just is so sweet. He is very similar to me I think from what we've said ... I don't know him well enough to really judge who he is but I find him extremely attractive & awesome soooo .... we'll see where it goes. I kind of want him to read this blog ... maybe not this message but my poetry. He'll learn so much about me that it would blow his mind. ;) I'm a mess & he really should know that before anything ever happens. I'm scared though. Obviously. I don't know how to flirt AT ALL!!!!!!!! Plus what if I over whelm him with everything. I am PERFECTLY fine with sharing anything & everything with people ... maybe not face to face but I can say it through writing which I know is cowardly but ... I am. I am a coward. I'm afraid. I can admit that to myself & the world. I just don't know what to say & what not to say so I run out of things to say & then I'm sitting there & ... yeah. But he's sweet & awesome. PLUS this crush formed during the winter which means it's not just all the endorphins of Spring. OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!!!!!! I feel amazing. After my surgery I felt like complete & total crap, but I feel amazing. Seriously. I feel like myself again. Even my mom (of all people) has noticed a difference. Life is good & amazing & I could die a happy person right now. SO heres to boys & food & Spring & to life! ;)